Embracing Motherhood: An Interview with Molly Nourmand, LMFT, Founder of Life After Birth®

Embracing Motherhood: An Interview with Molly Nourmand, LMFT, Founder of Life After Birth®

At The Daily Bloom, we are dedicated to sharing inspiring stories and valuable insights from experts who are making a difference in the lives of parents and children. We are thrilled to feature Molly Nourmand, LMFT, a Perinatal Psychotherapist and the Founder + Clinical Director of Life After Birth®. With a background in Psychodynamic Theory, yoga, meditation, and Somatic Experiencing, Molly has spent years supporting women through the transformative journey of motherhood. In this interview, Molly opens up about her personal experiences with birth trauma and postpartum depression, the creation of Life After Birth®, and offers heartfelt advice for new mothers navigating the challenges of parenthood. Join us as we delve into Molly's story and discover the profound impact of her work.

Can you tell us more about your personal journey with birth trauma and postpartum depression? How did these experiences inspire you to create Life After Birth®?

After my daughter was born, a combination of risk factors coupled with a birth complication, lack of support, isolation, sleep deprivation and marital challenges were the perfect storm for me developing Postpartum Depression (PPD). Since I’m a Psychotherapist armed with tools, resources and knowledge about Perinatal Mood and Anxiety Disorders (PMADs), I thought I would somehow be able to prevent it. I soon realized that I am not immune. As I began to recover, I felt called to hold space for the initiation into motherhood. I was underwhelmed with the lack of depth in the mommy & me groups I had attended, and was craving more honest conversations about the identity changes of becoming a mother. Hence, Life After Birth® was born in 2017. I began leading process-oriented support circles that help birthing people transition into parenthood. In addition, I serve the same population with 1:1 therapy sessions, postpartum planning and mothers retreats.

Can you share a particularly memorable success story or moment from your work with Life After Birth® that stands out to you?

Recently a client said to me, “You saved my life.” She was not saying it in a casual way–she was being literal. When she first started treatment, she was very depressed and had thoughts of not wanting to live anymore. Through our work together she processed trauma, elected to go on medication, took a medical leave in her job, put her child in full-time preschool, made some lifestyle changes (i.e. moved out of her in-laws’ home). I of course could not take credit for saving her life because it was truly a co-creation–she did the work and followed through on my recommendations. Now she is thriving, sleeping better, and enjoys her time with her son more. It’s stories like these that make me grateful for the work I get to do with mothers. 

What do you think are some of the biggest challenges that birthing people face when dealing with perinatal mood disorders?

When you are depressed or have experienced trauma, it can be difficult to function, let alone reach out for help. In addition, there is still a stigma surrounding mental health and shame associated with it–especially during pregnancy and new parenthood. So those factors are really a barrier for getting treatment.

What advice would you give to new mothers who might be struggling with the transition into parenthood?

I have found that support and community are everything postpartum. My advice for how to cultivate this would be to go to your local park (or coffee shop) daily. This way, you’re building in a ritual of getting out of the house, getting fresh air and sunshine and seeing other caregivers–moms, dads, grandparents, nannies. I would encourage you to strike up a conversation with someone, e.g. “How old is your baby?” I can attest that I did this at our local park and it became like Cheers. In other words, everyone knew my name, or at least my daughter’s name, and I even made some friends as a result.

How can partners, family, and friends best support someone going through postpartum depression or other perinatal mood disorders?

Ideally, they would have educated themselves on the signs of PMADs while the person is pregnant–especially if they are at risk for developing one–as well as connected with a therapist trained in perinatal mental health. Regardless if that happened or not, loved ones can do the following: 

  • Help the birthing person find a perinatal therapist and/or support circle such as Life After Birth®

  • Offer help in a specific, actionable way. Instead of asking, “What can I help with?” or “What do you want for dinner?” Say, “I’m ordering you some dinner tonight. Anything you are craving or do you want me to pick?”

  • Provide support with housekeeping (e.g. just start unloading the dishwasher), running errands (“I’m at Target…what’s on your list?”) and caring for the baby (if they want help with this) and/or support them in hiring someone to do the aforementioned.

As a mom, we often find ourselves multitasking and wearing many hats. Can you tell us about a typical day in your life, from morning routines to winding down in the evening?

I love waking up before my household. Whether it’s enjoying my coffee phone-free with my cat, meditating, writing or reading a passage from Buddhism for Mothers–this quiet time is sacred and really sets the tone for my day. I have found that it is vital for moms and therapists alike to fill our cups. 

Mondays are what I like to call get-your-life-back-together days. When you’re a parent, weekends are typically social, not restful. So I try to book some self-care on those days, prepare for the week, do admin, etc. My husband and I alternate dropping our daughter off at school or summer camp. So the days he does drop off, I typically will go to Pilates or yoga in the morning. 

Currently, all my appointments are telehealth, so I run groups, do 1:1 sessions and take meetings from my home office. I schedule my appointments when my daughter is in school or camp because I pick her up most days and occupy her in the afternoons with activities or playdates with my mom friends. I do the bulk of my clinical work Tuesday-Thursday. I like to use Fridays for tying up loose ends, organizing my schedule/availability for the following week and trying to do some more self-care (e.g. acupuncture). 

As for winding down, I like an early bedtime. My friends know if they text me after 9pm, then they won’t get a reply until morning. Unless I have an event or dinner to go to, I enjoy reading to my daughter, asking her to read to me and snuggling with her. Then we’ll listen to a guided meditation together on Insight Timer. Most nights I fall asleep early, unless my husband and I have a TV show we’re really into and will watch together.  

If you could go back and give your pre-parent self one piece of advice about balancing motherhood and entrepreneurship, what would it be?

Career pauses are okay. Time off is okay. Rest is okay. Naps are okay. Vacations are okay. 

What is your favorite Mini Bloom product and why do you love it?

Knots Be Gone! My daughter has curly hair, so conditioner is her BFF. This product helps smooth out any tangles making her curls look their best.